6 Ways to Know Yourself Better And Reconnect with Yourself
We all have the same experience.
We feel like we are losing ourselves and don’t know what to do next. No way out of the blue. But it is just because we didn’t explore ourselves enough and let our mind become stagnant.
Scientists tell us that we only use no more than 10% of our brain daily. And the other 90% remain unknown to us as it works unconsciously. But this 90 % can’t be ignored because they’re part of us ( a large part actually). When you start to pay attention to them, you’ll discover more about yourself and what you really want.
Here’re some tips for you catch your subconscious and tap into the unknown side of yourself.
Aim: recording the thoughts and feeling
Self-reflection is not about reproaching yourself for doing something wrong. Instead, it is about being honest with yourself and find out what do you really think and feel.
There are often two situations when you’re trying to self-reflect. One is you mind become empty. The other is you have too much thought in your mind. It is chaotic and you don’t know where to start.
To solve the first problem, you’ll have to make self-reflection a habit. Do it on a consistent basis, for example, one time a week. Find a specific time, as I do it on Sunday evening. Gradually your mind will open to you as it knows you’re getting familiar with it.
For the second problem, you can try freewriting which will be introduced below.
Aim: let your mind speak freely
We have 60000 to 70000 thoughts a day. But most of them are either gone unaware or being dismissed by us. There is a filter in our head that keep regulating us on what to think and what not to.
Those thoughts often show us who we’re and what we really want. But they’re unheard. Therefore, we need freewriting, which basically means write freely.
For a fixed period of time (like 15 min.) write down every thought that comes to your mind, word by word. No need to beautify your sentence. No need to care about your spelling. Certainly, don’t try to edit your writing. Just write. Also, try to keep up with the speed of thoughts.
After the writing session, review and you might find something surprising.
(There is more about freewriting. You can read Accidental Genius if you’re interested in it.)
Keeping a lifelog/ bullet journal
Aim: recording your life and finding the undetected detail
Unlike self-reflection, the lifelog is more about recording your habit. In the journal, you write down the things that you did and why you did it but not that. Just one sentence is enough.
Lifelog is a tool for tracking bad habits and how you spend your time. It helps to find the patterns in your life and enhance your awareness of your everyday life, which looks the same if you don’t pay attention to.
It makes you stay in the present and also find out the thought patterns.
Reach for new mindsets
Aim: know yourself from a different perspective
To know how other people are thinking, there are two ways, real-life communication and read books.
When you’re talking with your friends or someone, don’t just keep talking. Learn the art of listening and think about how and why they say that or how do they reach this conclusion. Try to catch their thinking.
Often when you hear something that doesn’t feel quite right to you, it is the time you need to try harder to understand, but not rebel.
To read a book is to have a paper conversation with the authors. They offer you not only techniques or knowledge. They’re telling you their experience that you may never have or a new perspective on looking the world.
These new mindsets are treasures to you because they bring you to the unknown where you may find yourself.
Try something new
Aim: explore the world
The aim here is actually quite similar to the above method, lead you to the unknown.
I am constantly trying new things to know myself more. Each week I assign myself 3 new tasks. They’re usually very small task, like trying a new recipe or go to school on a new route.
These small stimuli are already enough to open my mind and explore the unknown self. Often we follow the same routine every day, and our minds become stagnant. Our vision is limited and we can’t find way out.
But it is these tiny little things keep our mind vibrant and find the unknown-self.
Listen to your own voice.
Aim: reconnect with yourself
Feeling is the language of the body. It tells us what’s wrong by releasing pain and makes us sad. Feelings are the signal from the body and the unconscious mind. Often these signals can tell us what we want and don’t want in our subconscious and give us directions of our lives.
But we’re educated to rely on rational thinking, and ignore our own desire. We analyze everything and try to give everything a reason.
But not everything can be explained by rationality, just like science doesn’t always have the truth. Sometimes you have to follow the instinct. Your feeling may have been showing you the direction for a long time, but you just didn’t listen.
So before you go, I would like to remind you that finding yourself is about going into the unknown and turning your mindset around. The reason that you feel lost about yourself is that you’re limiting or ignoring yourself.
Next time if you feel lost or go into a dead end again, talk to yourself and see what you’ve overlooked or you can create a path by giving in new blood.
Share this article with your friends if they face the same problems and need some suggestions!
Further reading to for tips of being successful